Friday, June 3, 2011

Just not quite There...

Well..It's been a long long separation Mr.Blog!
So here I am..the first thing after i got hold of a blog I was searching for like crazy!

This blog entry is dedicated to a person whom I love from the deepest corners of my heart.Not from today but from that very moment when he described how he saw me for the first time and fell in Love with me.. Today..Almost three years..of being together... You know every secret..every strength and every weakness of Mine.My submission spoke for myself. And yet,you took what you saw and left?

I know the hurt an un-reciprocated love produces..but that is where you went wrong..It is not to be publicly displayed but is to be felt. And if you can truly hold your heart and tell me that you never felt it.. Then yes,It is my fault.

I ask you,my friends..How important is a "yes".. a status tag of being "girlfriend-boyfriend".. Where did the "lovers" and the "made for each other" go? Did they fade away with the necessity of being a show-off? Just because I wanted "us' to be mature..sensitive and as loving as it could be.. I became insensitive?

Why do we name relationships.. Brackets them into irreversible equations and stagnated mindsets? And then we conveniently call it to be a "miscommunication"? It isn't. The heart that loves always has direct linkages with the ones it Loves. Then why? Why doesn't the other person get it? Reciprocating is important,but just because you don't go over-the-board doesn't imply there is no love at all?

To love is to Love. Without boundaries. Without inhibitions. It always raises you. If our love has made you this way.. If our love has made you to be the Man you are today,I am ashamed,I could not love you true.
I could not show what and shall be in my heart.

But it isn't your fault. Neither is it mine. Because a fault would bring regret,deceit,sorrow and so much more.To me, I have been loved,appreciated,encouraged. Love.. Your Love made me feel like I was a woman of substance. It was like a dew drop the wetness,the freshness still continues to breathe.

A woman who could become a beautiful bird and sway in the darkest of skies,as you became the wind beneath her wings.. A dancer..who has had the "Leap of Faith" and you..her partner..Her eyes closed..her arms wide open..Ready to be submerged into the canopy of your soul as you take her into your arms and nestle your head under her silky streaks.. Her eyes moist as sher opens them.. To find.. She is fallen..The ground rough and her knee bruised..

What happened? How did it happen? Ahh..Poor soul.. They cried.

They didn't matter then. They never did. But the one who matters..could not be found. And there I saw the eyes...
wait..where did he just go..? Was he standing behind that crowd over there? I struggle to walk..towards him..limping but still very much.. Docile.
You're safe with me. Trust me. Let me be the One..
Your words tinkered into my if you were there..right there..somewhere..

The buzz around was just splintering into the stillness of the air. That's the feeling of having you around..but just not yet. You're inside of me. Every breath..Every Dream.. Every Vision.. Every scream..

But just not quite there...